Teachings of AL: Examinatorization!!!
Teachings about Examinations:
5 Crappy thingys to wander about Examinations…
1)When you’re “lost” during an exam for half the duration given the only thing you can hope for is a miracle to happen.
2)After you did an examination paper full with answers that suck and could make the lecturers laugh out loud plus you’re 100% sure you’re going to fail the paper… there’s only a few things you can do if you feel depressed:
a.Be positive and tell yourself you had prepared yourself the best way you ever could (even though it may not be true and it actually makes you feel worse).
b.Be an optimist and study harder & smarter for the next exam. (WARNING: you may be disappointed even more after failing again which can lead to emotional freakin breakdown).
c.Just be a little “emo” and tell yourself you’re ‘good-for-nothing’ or ‘not-good-for-everything’ and hope for some “angel” sent by God to be ‘caring’ and give you some attention to make you feel better.
d.Cry… Fall… Stand-up… Walk again…
e.Tell yourself, “Owh well… It’s not like my parents were any smarter.”
f.Get a pet to reduce depression growing rate (You’re still going to have flashbacks of the lecturer laughing at you when you came to meet him/her for extra marks anyway).
g.Songs can help… then the depression kicks in again.
h.Be a carefree soul and say “One paper down, two more to go and home-sweet-home!!!”
i.When the picture memory of your parents come in your mind and guilt starts to attack you with words like… “In her eyes she hope for me to graduate with flying colors.” Or “My parents see me as their favorite son/daughter to have a successful education.” You just need some time out for yourself… (You’re just guilty because you know you could do better or because of the fact that you just suck)
3)The only reason people would feel “better” or “happy” after hearing other people suck at some papers themselves is because:
a.They feel a sense of ‘belonging’ to some group of people that “suck in final exams” a feeling of having some friends that suck together… (God Damnit!! Just study for your own sake OK!)
b.Thinking that “Cool… I’m not the only crap-answer-giver around.”
c.Feeling that they are not minorities anymore.
d.They can feel safe because the lecturers won’t laugh at their own answers only.
e.They say to themselves that “Great luckily I didn’t study like hell like them.”
f.They feel ‘comfort’ with those words of “I did badly too…” and the song =You Are Not Alone by Michael Jackson= plays into their heads.
4)When you already (Like seriously without any jokes) studied and prepared all season long without any regrets, and still did badly in Exams… Well… At least you know that you did not fail because you didn’t try not to but failed because you were just not like Einstein.
5)Remember one thing about cheating in examinations:
“You can cheat just don’t get caught”
“Cheat papers are not suppose to be small… they should be miniatures that only you can read them”
“Thy shalt not go to the toilet more then 2 times to peek the cheat papers”
“Cheating is considered a sin to those who has studied so hard and a blessing for the people who just want to get good results at all cost”
3 comments November 7th, 2008
